


Iwaizumi v. the homosapien agenda

by skiereads



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Iwaizumi Hajime Being an Idiot, Iwaizumi Hajime is Bad at Feelings, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Angst, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mutual Pining, Oikawa Tooru & Sugawara Koushi Friendship, Pain, Pining Iwaizumi Hajime, Pining Oikawa Tooru, Protective Sugawara Koushi, Sad Oikawa Tooru, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-16 12:27:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29949978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skiereads/pseuds/skiereads
Summary: Things aren't always as they seem and sometimes love cant save you from yourself. Can Iwaizumi learn to accept himself before he loses the person that means the most to him forever. . . or is he too far gone down the path of self-hatred.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime & Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Oikawa Tooru & Sugawara Koushi
Kudos: 9





	1. Fuck you

**Author's Note:**

> if you're here from TikTok hi and thanks for coming to support! be prepared to be sad... if you're not here from TikTok well hi I did a series which this fic is based on @/ Todor0mey if you wanna watch This is my first fic so don't judge it too hard, I appreciate constructive criticisms though.

"Toru, it's not that bad"

" Really? Do you really think that?"

"Well... I just think--"

"Do you know what I think? Fuck you and fuck your mom, she called me a whore when I was way too young!” he screamed

_4 years ago_  
_“Hajime, I don't want that boy staying over anymore,” Iwaizumi-san said with a hushed tone in her kitchen one morning. “Okaa-san what do you mean. . . he's been staying over since we were like five” Hajime sighed trying to keep from raising his voice and causing a scene “Hajime. . . baby don't you hear what they say about him? You shouldn’t be associating with his kind people, they might start to talk about you too.” Hajime scoffed “ you know it's not like that mom. . . it's Toru, he isn’t like that and neither am I” Iwaizumi turned to her son “Hajime I’m not going to repeat myself, I don’t want the whore staying the night anymore, he’s going to influence you”_  
_A slight sound came from the stairway_  
_“Can't we talk about this later? I think Oikawa's awake”_  
_In the next room, fourteen-year-old Toru sucked in a deep breath and wiped the tears forming in his eyes. “Good morning Iwa-chan, Iwaizumi-san,” he said with a forced smile_

“ And Fuck you and Fuck your friends, I’d never heard half of those slurs until them” the anger leaving his voice, sadness replacing it.

_5 months prior_  
_“Hey Iwaizumi, what’s up with that Oikawa dude?” some guy from class 3-2 said_  
_“Yeah, why do you even hang out with that loser?” another chimed in._  
_Hajime did not know what to say. Oikawa is his best friend--the most important person in his life, but he’s not Oikawa’s boyfriend, and it’s not his job to defend him like he’s some damsel in distress.” Oikawa and I have known each other our whole lives, plus our moms are friends” he responded, not knowing what else to say._  
_“He’s kinda fruity. Plus haven’t you seen him check you out? It’s disgusting.” the first boy continued on, “I heard my mom telling some of her friends she saw him buying makeup”_  
_“God, can you get any gayer than that?” the second boy cut in “ Anyway Iwaizumi, catch you later... But my advice is to lose the annoying homo before you catch anything.” The two boys laughed a little bit, though there was no humor to be found in their comments._  
_As they walked away, Hajime felt a large breath exit from his lungs. In the next hallway, Toru clenched his fist lets out a shaky breath of his own and wiped the tears forming in his eyes. Once again, because of Iwaizumi Hajime, though he did not realize that yet._  
_That day was the first day Oikawa Toru missed practice, lying to the only person he’s ever been completely honest with. His best friend wasn’t batting an eye needing to believe the lie just as much and Toru needed him too._

“And Fuck you, and Fuck him and Fuck her and Fuck them and Fuck this and Fuck that-”

“Toru I-”  
“-and fuck you for what you did. . . and even more fuck you for what you didn’t.” Hot tears are already streaming down Toru’s face. His voice was raw and cracking from screaming. “I can’t do this anymore Hajime, I’m not gonna hide who I am for a person who isn’t honest with himself.” Oikawa turns away, Hajime grabs his hand  
“Toru wait, we can’t leave things like this”  
“Look Iwaizumi this is better for the both of us, you’ve got some stuff to figure out and I need to surround myself with people who accept me and love me regardless of what other people might say” as Toru rips his hand away storming out of the room and ignoring the destruction he made in such a short time.  
For the first time in Hajime’s life, he felt completely alone.


	2. Dear Diary

“Dear diary I met a boy, he made my dumb heart fill up with joy”  
4 months ago  
“ Nah Suga, I'm telling you he feels the same way, I just know it.” Through the other line, another voice responded.   
“I don't know Oikawa, I just wouldn't get your hopes up. . . Iwaizumi is your best friend and he cares about you a lot. You don't wanna read too much into it.” Toru threw his pillow at his phone playfully.  
“I need you to trust me on this one Suga, I know Iwa-chan better than anyone and I just know that there's something there. . . when we look at each other there's this... spark.” Toru let out a soft sigh and with that, Sugawara could tell Oikawa was so hopelessly in love with Iwaizumi. There would be no way to talk him down.   
“Alright Oikawa I trust you, so what's next, where do you want this to go?”  
The pause between them is a little longer than comfortable “Oikawa?” Suga questioned  
after what felt like an eternity.   
“Suga... look, things are complicated, and even if I'm right, you know what it would be like. One of us would end up heartbroken and you and I both know it would be him and not me.” Suga could practically feel Oikawa's breathing get slower.  
“Iwa-chan and I are forever Suga, and I can't be selfish with him. Everything and I mean everything I have, I have with or because of him. He's my partner, my best friend, he makes me-” Toru paused, looking at a picture on his desk of a 7 year-old him with a smile brighter than any star in the night sky. Next to him as always, was his Iwa-chan, Toru swallowed a deep breath “a better person.” Suga knew then and there, that everything Oikawa said was true. He would do absolutely anything for Iwaizumi even if that meant swallowing his pride.   
“ Damn Oikawa, don't go getting soft on me,” Oikawa chuckled in response, lightening the mood.   
“I wouldn't count on it Sugawara, I'm always gonna be a force to be reckoned with,” Their conversation continued as if they hadn't just talked about something challenging the view everyone seemed to have of Toru. Continuing with pleasantries and small chit-chat about volleyball, university applications, and the main struggles of being a teenage boy.  
✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰ ✰  
“Dear diary we fell apart, welcome to the life of Electra heart”   
Toru looked to his walls, then to his bookshelf cluttered with memories, memories of a person who, at the very thought of him, brings him pain. A person who was immortalized in every corner of the room. Toru knew what he needed right then and that was to forget. He dialed the first person that came to mind, a person who loves him no matter what “Hey wanna get wasted?” he said, voice raspy from crying for what felt like days but couldn't have been more than an hour or two.

“Oikawa, are you okay? What's going on?” the concern through the other line was obvious.  
“Look Suga, I don't want a lecture or to talk about it.” Toru took a deep breath, pausing for longer than he should have, looking at the photo adorned on his desk. Just another reminder of the memories that haunted him. He took the frame and contemplated the many things he could do with it. But at that moment, all he could bring himself to do was put it face down in the same corner it had been in for 5 years. “I just need to forget, so are you gonna come or what?”   
“Yeah, of course. . . Let's do it” Sugawara knew Oikawa needed him to be supportive, but that did not mean he was not worried about what happened to his friend, or why he would call him over Iwaizumi.


End file.
